The kind of guy who is successful in life is exactly the type of guy that women find attractive.
So how do we define “successful”?
Isn’t the definition of success different for everybody? After all to succeed depends upon achieving the goals that you have set for yourself. Well, although the goals themselves may vary, setting and achieving goals plays an important part in becoming a successful guy.
In your business pursuits and in your life in general, goal setting is a simple task. In seduction however (as with most things to do with women), goal setting can be counter-intuitive.
How to Set and Accomplish Goals
In your day-to-day life, you may simply want to get fitter. Ask yourself:
“How can I accomplish this?”
The best resource is usually the Internet or a book. Getting fit is a bit of a contentious issue as there are many different viewpoints. The solution is to find someone who is fit and find out how they achieved it. When you do this, you find that it’s a combination of exercising regularly and eating healthily. So you ask yourself:
“How can I exercise regularly?”
You do a bit more research and find out that you can go to the gym, you can go running, etc. You keep breaking your goal down into smaller and smaller goals until you have goals which are small enough that you feel comfortable doing them.
The process, in a nutshell is:
- Decide on your goal.
- Research the goal.
- Break it down into sub-goals.
- Repeat steps 1-3 until your sub-goals are manageable.
- Take action to carry out each sub-goal.
Business goals are the same. You may have a goal to earn a certain amount of money within a certain amount of time. You do research about people who have made the amount of money you want and find out what method they used. You break down their methodology into smaller steps and repeat until you understand what you need to do, how to do it and have sub-goals that you can take action upon straight away.
Careful of Goal-Setting in Seduction
Your seduction goals can be accomplished in the same way. You find out from guys who are getting laid how they did it and copy them. You find out what they did, break it down and do it. Sometimes the research you have to do cannot be done by reading. You have to do it yourself on the street. Either way, from the results of your research , you’ll be able to set yourself another sub-goal which will get you closer to being able to fucking hot women on a regular basis.
The proviso is that when it comes to seduction, your goal should always be about yourself and not the woman.
Before you go out for a few hours to walk the streets in search of hot women, it is a good idea to set a goal for yourself to accomplish during those few hours. A good goal is:
- Remember to give strong eye contact to each woman you talk to on the approach.
A bad goal is:
- I absolutely will not stop until you have taken the numbers of fifteen girls.
Why is the first goal good and the second goal bad?
The first goal is good is because it is something that will improve your game and it is something that you can control. The second goal is bad because you have no control over whether a girl will give you her number or not and you are in big danger of losing your outcome-independence. When it comes to seduction, wanting something too much stops you getting it.
What Kind of Goals Should You Be Setting for Yourself?
Well it depends on what your overall purpose in life is. If you don’t currently know what that is, you should read through this post on Definiteness of Purpose. Once you know what your main goal is in life, you can use the steps above to break it down. It may take you years to achieve your main goal, but all the time you’re working toward it, you will have a great sense of purpose and direction and feel happy. When you don’t have anything to work towards you feel lost and depressed.
Now can you see why a man who is striving towards something is attractive to women?
When you accomplish a task, no matter how small it is, you feel great.
Write down your goals in a notebook and cross them off when you achieve them. Give yourself a big pat on the back when you attain a medium-sized goal and set the world on fire when you accomplish a life goal.
Everyone gravitates towards a guy who feels great about himself and this is the kind of man you will be if you’re setting and accomplishing goals. Making money and learning seduction are just two more things that you can learn, and as they are skills, you can break them down and learn them bit by bit. Just make it your goal to learn how to do it and then put yourself into action.
Feeling good about yourself, having knowledge and experience through accomplishing your goals and possibly even having earned a good income will give you confidence in your life.
Confidence and Self-Assurance
Everyone says that confidence is the most attractive thing a man can have. Well, confidence is just situational competence. If you can look at a situation where you have no competence and know that all it takes to master it is to apply the goal-setting formula above and spend a little time on it, you have no reason to feel a lack of confidence in any situation.
This is self-assurance.
Self-assurance is an overall aura of confidence. When you become self assured, you are coming from an internal locus of validation. You know you have value, because you give it to yourself and nobody can take it away from you. This self-assurance is at the heart of masculinity and if you were to ask me what every man’s overall purpose should be, it is to achieve self-assurance. You become a man by accomplishing many things.
A man of value. A high value guy.