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June, 2015 | MortPUA

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Archives for June 2015

It’s About The Process, Not The Goal

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I’m working on a business during my spare time. It takes up the majority of the free hours that I have when I’m not working at my slave job, sleeping, eating or doing seduction-related activities. I’ve been working at it really hard for weeks now but haven’t really seen any discernable results yet. There have been times when I’ve thought to myself,

“Is it really worth it? Why don’t you just relax and chill out instead or working your arse off for nothing?”

But then I remember the lesson that game taught me.

When I first started learning Daygame, there were many times when I felt exactly the same way. I’d go out at the weekend to talk to girls but almost every one I spoke to had a boyfriend (so they said) or was really busy and in a rush to get somewhere. I’d be traipsing around the streets for hours on end and often think to myself,

“Is it really worth it? Why don’t you just chill out, go home and wank off to some porn? Who needs to fuck real women anyway?”

But then I looked back over my life at the years of frustration. I looked back and saw that lack of sex. The inability to meet women that I wanted to meet, not whoever I met by chance or desperation. And I said to myself,

“Fuck that. I’m not going back to that. I’m going to work my arse off until I get what I want and I’m NOT GOING TO STOP, EVER.”

So, I went out every Saturday and every Sunday, rain or shine and talked to woman after woman. I slowly got better. The progress was so slow that at the time I seemed to be going nowhere fast. I felt like I was walking on a treadmill. But looking back now, I can see the gradual improvement. The small victories. I’d pick myself up from the setbacks and continuing on regardless.

At the time though, all I could think of was the goal. To meet a girl on the street and use my skill to get her back home and fuck her. Then be able to do that consistently and build myself a rotation of girls that I could fuck, so I’d never have to go without sex ever again.

But I was still treading the streets and that goal seemed like an impossible dream. I put myself under such a lot of pressure. I felt like I was going to go mad sometimes.

Then one small shift in my mindset changed it all.

Instead of focussing on the goal, I focussed on the process.

Get A Map And Break The Journey Into Pieces

I still had the goal in mind, but I wasn’t reaching for it all the time. I knew that I was walking along a road, at the end of which was sex with hot girls. I didn’t know how far I’d have to walk to get there, but I knew that if I walked for long enough I’d eventually get there. I also knew what I’d encounter on my journey because I had a map.

My map was the Daygame Blueprint.

So I concentrated on one section of the journey at a time. I knew that other guys before me had followed the blueprint and achieved their goals. I knew that if just worked on it for long enough, I’d be able to replicate their success. So I concentrated on the process.

Each section of the blueprint is a skill in itself and if you go out on the street and practice it on girls, you will get results. You can analyse the results, go out again and refine your understanding. Refine your ability to implement that section of the blueprint until you begin to get the results you’re looking for.

When you reach that point, it’s like you’ve walked a hundred miles but not even noticed it. Because all you were doing was concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other.

You keep on doing that and eventually you have mastered each of the sections of the blueprint in order. Then, BOOM! You just laid a hot girl. And you can repeat your results over and over because you know the process.

The Lessons You Learn From Game Apply To The Rest Of Your Life

That’s what’s keeping me going with my business. Other people have made serious money from the business model that I’m following. It’s a passive income business model, so my goal is to make enough money from it to be able to quit my slave job. This will give me the freedom to live my life on my own terms. On my wall in a place where I look regularly, I have a piece of paper on which I wrote in capital letters:

MAIN GOAL – PRIORITY #1

  • FREEDOM
    • TO BE ABLE TO GO WHERE I WANT TO GO, DO WHAT I WANT TO DO, WHEN I WANT TO DO IT
    • TO ANSWER ONLY TO MYSELF

That’s the goal, but I’m focussing on the process. I bought a course which explains the blueprint of the business model. All I need to do is to put in continuous effort and follow the process. I know that I’ll achieve my goal.

Then I guess I’ll set another one.

Are You A Theory Junkie?

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When I first discovered the world of seduction in 2005, there wasn’t much information about. I downloaded a couple of David DeAngelo books, a couple of his video courses and a set of his ‘Interviews with Dating Gurus’ CDs. I watched, read and listened to them all several times. The problem with DeAngelo is that all his material is about ‘how to be attractive to girls’ and he gives very little information about the mechanics of approaching girls and actually seducing them.

It’s obvious now that he’s just a marketing genius and never really had any skills to begin with. Anybody seen a David DeAngelo approach video? No? I thought not.

It wasn’t all bad though, because his material is very good for inner game. Once you know what it is about guys that attracts women, you have a goal to work towards. Coincidentally, the majority of the qualities that men who are attractive to women have are those linked to high levels of masculinity. Thus, we can see that becoming a masculine guy is part of the process in your goal of becoming a guy who can seduce women. The other part encompasses the mechanics and techniques of initiating and cultivating an interaction with a hot girl, which leads to sex.

So, I was working on my inner game but I still had no idea how to meet attractive girls.

In actual fact it’s very easy. You see a hot girl and you walk up to her and say “Hi”.

Of course, when you’re starting out, the thought of actually approaching a girl is the last thing to cross your mind. There must be techniques! There must be tricks! You have to see a ‘Seduction Guru’ approach a girl in the street, right in front of your own eyes, before you can even begin to consider it to be anything other than totally impossible.

Theory Junkie

So, just like almost every other guy who begins their seduction journey, I looked for more information. I found the Mystery Method! I bought some nail polish and painted half my finger nails black and the other half white. I travelled to the city centre at the weekend at around lunchtime, went up to a random girl and said,

“Excuse me, I was just looking for an opinion. Which colour looks best on my nails? Black or white?”

The girl looked at me like I was a bit weird. She started edging away from me, made an excuse and scurried off. I tried it on another couple of girls with similar results.

“Fuck this shit. It doesn’t work. And I feel fucking gay”, I thought.

So I did more reading and found Shark‘s ‘Playboy Lifestyle’ and ‘Attract & Date’ CDs. He scorned the idea of peacocking and asking girls for opinions. He said, “Go up to the girl and tell her you like her”. Playboy Lifestyle was more oriented to clubs, so I went out to clubs but I would just wander around and not talk to girls. It seemed to me that a club is designed to do two things:

  1. Extract as much money from you as possible in the form of highly priced, watered down booze.
  2. Make it as hard as possible for you to meet and talk to girls, hence making you buy more booze, to get what we English call ‘Dutch Courage‘.

Luckily, the Attract & Date CDs seemed a bit more flexible. The material actually applied to daytime pickup in the street. The problem was, it consisted of eight CDs. I did actually listen to them many times over. I went out consistently, every Saturday for almost a year, trying to make myself go up to a hot girl and tell her,

“I like you and I want to get to know you.”

I never succeeded. But even if I had done, I wouldn’t have known what to do next. The only component of the structure of a pickup that Shark talks about is the approach. He explains all about how society forces you from your childhood to be a slave and a worker-bee. He also gives all sorts of missions to accomplish to supposedly break you free from society’s chains. I guess they helped me strengthen my inner game, but I still wasn’t approaching girls and that meant that I wasn’t getting laid either.

I actually travelled to Zagreb in Croatia for a bootcamp with Shark in 2008 after a year of failed approach attempts. He took me and a couple of other guys out on the streets and into the bars of Zagreb and made us approach girls. It was such a wonderful feeling! Shark is actually a really good approach coach and I ended up getting two dates during my weekend in Croatia’s capital city. However, the less said about his new-age spiritualist ideas, the better.

So, I returned to London thinking that I was cured of Approach Anxiety and eager to get out on the streets to apply what I’d learned. Then I was struck down by the ‘flu and had to lie in bed for a week to recover. Much to my surprise, after my recuperation, I was unable to approach women again. It was the same old mental block and the washing machine feeling in my stomach. During my week in bed, the excuses had returned. I kept trying for a bit but then gave up and then retreated to seduction forums.

Forum Junkie

On the forums I was a master seducer, drawing on my extensive knowledge of game theory to create expansive stories of my feats of seduction. Feats which were by no means duplicated in real life. I gave wonderful advice to other people who were also struggling, but it was advice that I wasn’t even following myself. This went on for months until I was forced to give up seduction by being made redundant from my job. That mean that I had to go back to University to retrain for a job in a more recession-proof industry.

It’s more than seven years later now and I’ve actually managed to learn how to seduce women. I have thousands of approaches under my belt. However, I go on forums now and see guys who are just like I was. I can tell a mile off whether someone is a theory junkie or whether they’re talking from experience. My advice to you is to avoid theory and just take as much action as you can.

Now that the seduction scene has matured, there are actual frameworks that you can adopt. You can follow them step-by-step and if you practice enough, you will go from never having approached a girl before to having sexual freedom, within a matter of months. Daygame is one such method. I’ll admit that I’m not familiar with all the others, but I’m sure there are alternatives out there if you wish to look.

Let me give you a couple of pieces of advice:

  • Once you find a method that suits your personality, forget everything else and just concentrate on that.
  • Don’t overload yourself with information. Try and assimilate only the information that is relevant to you at that particular moment. For example, there’s no point in you knowing how to kino-escalate on a woman if you can’t even approach yet. Concentrate on the approach. The same applies to each step of the seduction process. It’s a ladder. You can only climb one rung at a time.

In the end, after I finished University and decided that I wanted to get back out there and really learn this seduction thing, one event changed everything for me. I went on a forum and found someone who lived in my city who also wanted to go out and learn how to meet women. We met up and forced each other to approach girls. We did it every weekend for months until we could actually get numbers, go on dates and fuck these women. Bootcamps are okay, but constant progress is made by taking action consistently over a long period of time.

Don’t sit in front of a computer all the time, reading theory. Get out of your house, get your feet on the street and start saying “Hi” to some hotties.