When you’re beginning the process of learning Daygame, it really helps that there is a set structure. I hear intermediate and experienced Daygamers telling novices to forget structure and just freestyle. I just think they’re forgetting how they got where they are. It’s like sitting a learner driver behind the wheel and saying, “Okay, just freestyle. You’ll learn how to drive eventually.”
Sure, you’ll learn. This is how Yad, Mystery, and all the pioneers started. They knew nothing and just experimented until they came up with something that worked. But you don’t have to. I’ve there’s a structure, learn it and then modify it to your needs and your personality. Then you’ll cut down the time required to learn how to meet and seduce girls to something which is manageable. Instead of taking six years, you can start seeing results in six months to a year.
The structure of the standard Daygame set is: Approach, Opener, Assumption stack, Rapport / Attraction, Number close / Instadate.
After a few months of going out regularly to meet girls, you can take a split second to ask yourself where you are in the structure and what you need to do to get yourself to the next stage. Along the way, you’ll learn the different gambits, techniques and mindsets required to optimise each stage and every time you go out, you will fine-tune your skills.
Most of the stages have specific mechanisms that you can use to increase your chances of getting a positive response from the girl. You mix these mechanisms with spontaneity and inspiration to create an interesting and fun storyline to your interaction. Daygame requires you to use the logical and creative sides of your brain simultaneously.
How To Fix Your Rapport Failings
One of the things that many guys struggle with initially is what to talk to the girl about during the rapport stage. The answer is to make sure that you’re listening to what she is saying. That’s why we make assumptions about her after the opener. We’re looking for an insight into her interests and passions so we can weave a story about them.
Once you spoken to enough girls, you’ll find that there becomes a pattern. You’ll think, “Ah, this is an X girl” or “This is a Y girl” and you can bring up topics from previous sets to get rapport. Every girl has her own unique slant on life and you use your experience to tell stories about when you were in a similar situation and what happened.
But what happens when you don’t have any experience with the threads that she brings up? For example, what if you met a tanned dark haired girl and you tell her that you admire her Mediterranean looks? She smiles shyly and tells you she’s from Barcelona. What do you say next?
Personally, I’ve been to Barcelona. I can tell her how I went to the Sagrada Familia cathedral and spent the whole day there. How I went up the top of one of the towers and saw the extent of the city. How I got vertigo crossing a small bridge from one tower to another. I can tell her how much I like Chorizo Sausage or how I prefer Chicken Paella to Seafood Paella. She’s going to have an opinion on what I said: “Oh the Sagrada Familia is such a waste of money, it’s just a tourist trap”, “Gaudi is overrated”, “What? You don’t like seafood?”, etc, etc.
If you know something about what she’s talking about, rapport becomes much easier. After speaking to a few hundred girls, you’ll be able to spot trends. You’ll find yourself approaching one type of girl more than another. This is fine. Everyone has their own taste in women. Use this to your advantage.
Do Your Homework
If you find that you like Italian women, but you’ve never been to Italy, get yourself on a plane and go visit Rome, Milan, Venice and Naples. Rapport will be so much easier when you actually have an opinion based on experience. You can take the piss out of her native customs, you can tell her your favourite and least favourite things about her country.
If you can’t visit your favourite girls’ countries, you’ll eventually get stories and assumptions that you can give by spending time with these girls and asking questions about their homelands. You can then use these stories with other girls. For example, I really like native Chinese girls, but I’ve never been anywhere near China. If I meet one and she tells me that’s where she’s from, I often give her a fictional story about a friend of mine who visited and told me about his experiences.
I’ll tell her, “I have a friend who went to China a couple of years ago. He went to Beijing, Shanghai and Hong Kong, but he liked Hong Kong best because it’s still a little bit English. They still have double-decker busses and stuff.”
The information about the double-decker buses is something I found out from a girl I met on the street who was from Hong Kong. I don’t know how many times I’ve told a variation of that story. In fact it’s been getting a little stale recently. To end that problem, I’ve booked myself a holiday to China in August. That will give me a lot more to talk about and relate to with the girls I meet.
You don’t have to have experience at all. You can just make assumptions about her origin. This is some that Jon Matrix does a lot. If she tells you she’s from Australia, you can say something like:
“I’ve never been to Australia before, but I imagine that the weather is always sunny. You spend all of your time drinking beer and barbecuing on the beaches. Girls wear bikinis 24/7 and everyone travels to work by surfboard.”
This is just taking a bunch of stereotypes and mashing them together. She’ll either get indignant or laugh out loud. Either way you’ve received a reaction from her which will give you more to talk about.
As an exercise, after a day on the street talking to girls, ask yourself what information you found out about where they’re from and write it down. Watch videos about these places and the people that live there. Try and find out amusing facts or embarrassing stories that you can relay to girls in the future. Or better still, go and visit these places.
One thing that a lot of guys forget is that knowledge is one of the attraction devices (the others being push/pull, teasing, challenging, domination, sexual vibe, etc) that you weave into your interactions. If you have strong general knowledge, the girls is going to be impressed and attracted to you. If you have specific knowledge about her home town or country, she’ll be even more attracted.